Dogs

This is Zootoo.com’s program dedicated to Pet News.

Watch as Laura and Beth bring you real pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction.

This episode;
Voting Dog
Horse Sushi
Kept Alive by Rabbit and Horse Blood
Ace Sniffer Dogs Fired
Kitten Rescued from Sewer Drain
Canine Behind the Wheel

Show transcript;

BETH: A Voting Dog, Horse Sushi, and a Canine behind the wheel! Today, on Zootoo News.

BETH: Real Pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction.

LAURA: Because when things get catty, it’s a good thing.

Story 1
LAURA: Jane Balogh of Federal Way, Washington
could face felony charges because she registered her Australian shepherd-terrier mix, Duncan, to vote.

She said she did this to make a point that Washington’s voting requirements are too lax.

In the prior 3 elections, she sent in bogus ballots and even signed the dog’s voter registration card with a paw print.
Wow, I can’t believe it took authorities so long to catch this.
Duncan’s not even American!

Story 2
BETH: Due to shortages of tuna in Japan, sushi chefs are now contemplating horse meat.

A tuna scare in 1973 forced sushi chefs to find other red-colored substitutes like raw horse.

One Tokyo restaurant owner says worse comes to worse, they will use the surprisingly tasty horse meat once again.

LAURA: You mean Sea Horse, right?

BETH: No. Horse Horse.

Sushi picture receives horse tail.

Both girls lean over and “vomit”.

Story 3
BETH: A seriously ill teenager is being kept alive by horse and rabbit blood.

Cara Heaney was diagnosed with a rare illness called aplastic anaemia.

She is now receiving transfusions of Horse antibodies and rabbit blood products to fighting off bone-marrow failure.
Her mother said: “Without this treatment Cara would not be alive today.”
When asked if she feels differently after these transfusions, 14 year old Cara said “Nay!”

LAURA: [Wow. Pretty good.] You do any other horse impressions?

BETH: slaps. Blows lips. Stops.

LAURA: Anything else?

BETH: Nay.

Story 4
LAURA: Two street mutts who became ace sniffer dogs at a Thailand airport have been fired for
urinating on luggage and
sexually harassing female passengers.

Apparently, so many passengers complained about their lewd behavior they had to be fired.

BETH: Come on, can you blame them? I mean, did you see those skirts they were wearing!?

LAURA: I’m not saying they were asking for it, but…

Story 5
LAURA: A gray tabby kitten, trapped in a storm sewer drain in West Verginia,
finally climbed out after 250 gallons of water were pumped into the drain.

On the scene of the rescue were 2 firetrucks, 5 firefighters, and several animal rescuers.

Geez, that’s a lot of men to get excited over one wet pussy…

BOTH: …cat.

Story 6
BETH: In Idaho, a black lab named Charlie drove a car into the river,
while his owner was running in for a pizza.

Somehow the dog got the car in neutral and coasted straight into the water,
jumping out before it sank.

BETH: Be careful on the road — watch out for driving dogs and Paris Hilton!

LAURA: Yeah!, and now he’s charged with a D.U.I. — Doggie Under Influence!

BETH: Yeah! And you can bet the punishment will be Ruff!

LAURA: Charlie’s owner should have taught him to put the car in Bark!

And they laugh and laugh.

Have text appear — Thanks for watching Zootoo News. Real Pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction. (As if we can’t say it cause we are laughing too hard).

Duration : 0:4:1

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Tags: Bunny, canine, cat, comedy, dog, Driving, funny, Horse, Hoyt, kitten, News, pet, Rabbit, Sushi, Valpey, Vote, Weird, Wet, Zoo, Zootoo   Posted pet dogs |