This is Zootoo.com’s program dedicated to Pet News.
Watch as Laura and Beth bring you real pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction.
This episode;
Voting Dog
Horse Sushi
Kept Alive by Rabbit and Horse Blood
Ace Sniffer Dogs Fired
Kitten Rescued from Sewer Drain
Canine Behind the Wheel
Show transcript;
BETH: A Voting Dog, Horse Sushi, and a Canine behind the wheel! Today, on Zootoo News.
BETH: Real Pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction.
LAURA: Because when things get catty, it’s a good thing.
Story 1
LAURA: Jane Balogh of Federal Way, Washington
could face felony charges because she registered her Australian shepherd-terrier mix, Duncan, to vote.
She said she did this to make a point that Washington’s voting requirements are too lax.
In the prior 3 elections, she sent in bogus ballots and even signed the dog’s voter registration card with a paw print.
Wow, I can’t believe it took authorities so long to catch this.
Duncan’s not even American!
Story 2
BETH: Due to shortages of tuna in Japan, sushi chefs are now contemplating horse meat.
A tuna scare in 1973 forced sushi chefs to find other red-colored substitutes like raw horse.
One Tokyo restaurant owner says worse comes to worse, they will use the surprisingly tasty horse meat once again.
LAURA: You mean Sea Horse, right?
BETH: No. Horse Horse.
Sushi picture receives horse tail.
Both girls lean over and “vomit”.
Story 3
BETH: A seriously ill teenager is being kept alive by horse and rabbit blood.
Cara Heaney was diagnosed with a rare illness called aplastic anaemia.
She is now receiving transfusions of Horse antibodies and rabbit blood products to fighting off bone-marrow failure.
Her mother said: “Without this treatment Cara would not be alive today.”
When asked if she feels differently after these transfusions, 14 year old Cara said “Nay!”
LAURA: [Wow. Pretty good.] You do any other horse impressions?
BETH: slaps. Blows lips. Stops.
LAURA: Anything else?
BETH: Nay.
Story 4
LAURA: Two street mutts who became ace sniffer dogs at a Thailand airport have been fired for
urinating on luggage and
sexually harassing female passengers.
Apparently, so many passengers complained about their lewd behavior they had to be fired.
BETH: Come on, can you blame them? I mean, did you see those skirts they were wearing!?
LAURA: I’m not saying they were asking for it, but…
Story 5
LAURA: A gray tabby kitten, trapped in a storm sewer drain in West Verginia,
finally climbed out after 250 gallons of water were pumped into the drain.
On the scene of the rescue were 2 firetrucks, 5 firefighters, and several animal rescuers.
Geez, that’s a lot of men to get excited over one wet pussy…
BOTH: …cat.
Story 6
BETH: In Idaho, a black lab named Charlie drove a car into the river,
while his owner was running in for a pizza.
Somehow the dog got the car in neutral and coasted straight into the water,
jumping out before it sank.
BETH: Be careful on the road — watch out for driving dogs and Paris Hilton!
LAURA: Yeah!, and now he’s charged with a D.U.I. — Doggie Under Influence!
BETH: Yeah! And you can bet the punishment will be Ruff!
LAURA: Charlie’s owner should have taught him to put the car in Bark!
And they laugh and laugh.
Have text appear — Thanks for watching Zootoo News. Real Pet news that proves the truth is stranger than fiction. (As if we can’t say it cause we are laughing too hard).
Duration : 0:4:1
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